“I’m an introvert. I like my alone space. But you don’t have alone space anymore when you’re a mom. With two kids, that’s something I had to navigate. Especially with my first child. Two months after he was born, I developed postpartum depression. I got severe anxiety. Like leaving the house with him was a lot. Like he had to eat all the time. Everything felt overwhelming.

“I recognized what was happening. But I kind of didn’t want to deal with it. My mother-in-law asked my husband to talk to me. She saw that I was not OK. And he was like, ‘I notice you’re different. What’s going on?’ So I told him. And at that point I stopped breastfeeding, which helped. I didn’t have to be there every three hours. It gave me a little freedom. I also went on antidepressant medication for a while, which made things a little less dark.

“When I got pregnant with my daughter, my son was only 10 months old. And I was terrified. I ended up going to therapy. It helped, to know that how I was feeling was OK. That I’m not the only one who goes through it. Because there is a lot of postpartum depression with moms. We don’t really talk about it. For a lot of people, it’s hard to ask for help. I was in that position with my first child. But with my daughter, it ended up being a lot easier. Everything wasn’t new. I kind of knew what to do. And I joined MOMS Club. That was a big help. It pushed me to get out, to be around other people, to start conversations. It provided me with support. It helped me instantly.

“When we moved here from California, I didn’t know anyone. It’s always been hard for me to start friendships. But I knew if I wanted to build a life here, I needed to find other people to be around. That’s why I started a MOMS Club chapter. We’re all stay-at-home moms, or moms who work part-time. We meet up during the day. We go to the park. We have a monthly moms’ night out without kids. But most of all, it’s support. An adult to talk to during the day instead being alone with your kids.

“Now I feel like I’m better able to help other moms, especially those with younger kids. My advice to them is to take care of yourself. As long as you take care of yourself, you can take care of your kids.”

— Annemarie Padilla

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“Not married. I have one son. He’s 6. It’s great. It’s a life-changing experience.

“I’m trying not to force too much of the world on him right now. I don’t want him to be worried about all the stuff we have to worry about as adults. I like kids to actually be kids.

“There are a lot of kids having kids these days. Sometimes, I don’t think they get to live that kid life like I did. I grew up around a lot of older people. My great-aunt and my great-grandmother are the people who raised me. And I actually got to be a kid.

“I’ve always enjoyed being out in nature. So I’m trying to get my son away from electronics, and go outside to do things like ride bikes and horses, and to fish. I’ve been fishing since I was about 6. My great-aunt taught me, and it stuck. It’s kind of like my meditation. It’s a good way to relax, to get away from the world. Just you and the water. I’m hoping I can pass that along to my son.”

— Demond Carson

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“I was 21 when I had my first child and 23 when I had my second. My stepmom always talks about us being babies. She’ll say, ‘You were babies having babies.’ Our son is 21 now and our daughter is 18. They’re both off at college, so it’s different around the house.

“You hear of people like us who got married young, had kids young, their kids move out, and then they don’t know each other anymore. It can create an awkward environment for a marriage. Alan and I had a lot of open discussion about it leading up to this point. We were like, OK, the kids are both going to be out of the house. So what do we want to do, as this is like our second honeymoon.

“One of the things we came up with is once every two months, we take a trip together. We go somewhere for a weekend, just to reconnect away from home. We also have date nights, which we’ve actually done pretty steadily for the past 12 years or so.

“It did get a little scary leading up to our daughter moving out. You kind of start thinking, what are we going to talk about? What if we run out of things to say to each other? What’s interesting is that we’ve noticed how refreshing it is to have uninterrupted conversations. Don’t get me wrong. We are incredibly blessed with two great kids. They love being with us and we love having them around. But it’s different now.

“Alan and I have dinner together every night. We’re able to have conversations about what’s going on at work, our hopes and plans for the future, just whatever. It’s kind of like we’re dating again.

“It’s funny. We used to be those 20-year-olds who had young children. Friends our age at the time would invite us to go somewhere, and we were like, ‘No, sorry, we’ve got kids.’ But now some of those same friends who are in their 30s and 40s can’t go do things because they have kids. And we’re like, aha. Now the shoe is on the other foot.”

— Michelle Carlson

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“When I heard about the coronavirus, the first thing I did was pray, ‘Please don’t close the schools. Please don’t close the schools.’ My boys are particularly rambunctious, and they don’t always get along perfectly with each other. So when the kids usually go to school, it’s a very nice break for everybody to have their own time away from each other. But of course they did close the schools, and I understand why that was needed. Now here we are, all together.

“At first, I thought it might be similar to summer when everyone’s home. But it’s not. Obviously, there’s school online and their homework. And during the summer break I might say, ‘Let’s go to the library today,’ ‘Let’s go to the splash pad,’ or ‘Let’s go see if a friend can play.’ But those are not options right now.

“One activity that has been pretty successful for us is to have a snack in the afternoon while I read to them. I’ve been reading ‘Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians.’ They seem to enjoy that and sit still. In fact, the other day, my oldest said, ‘Mom, you never read to us today.’ And I’m like, ‘Well, today was kind of crazy.’

“I’m trying my best, but there’s a lot to juggle. Everyone’s wanting me at the same time. I’m trying to help this kid find out what’s going on with a computer program here. The baby’s crying over here. And sister wants me to read her a story. But I’m like, there’s only one me.

“My husband’s work has quarantined, so he’s been working from home. So if things get really bad, I can call out to him to take the baby for a little bit. I walked in one day, handed him the baby, and said, ‘It is now officially Take Your Daughter to Work Day.’

“I just try to find those breaks where I can. I see some people on Facebook saying, ‘Oh, what do I do with all my extra time?’ And I’m thinking, what extra time are you talking about? I’m busier than I’ve ever been.”

— Holly Suisse

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“My passion is the kids. That’s why we opened the Promise Center, which came out of Gen. Colin Powell’s national campaign started in 1997 to get involved and make a difference in the lives of children. We wanted to give young kids a safe environment where they have a chance to learn, express themselves, and understand the importance of giving back and being part of their community. We’re not under the national umbrella so everything we do, we rely on grants, donations and volunteers.”

The Promise Center was going strong for about seven years, before it found itself without a home. Three years later, he found a solution.

“I learned that this old building was going to be torn down, so I called the owners and we worked out a deal to be able to use it. God bless Exxon volunteers, who helped us gut the place. We’ve been painting and fixing it up ever since.

“We’re starting to get our programs back together, and just recently had a very successful fundraiser. So now that we have programs growing, we can start applying for grants again.

“We’re trying to turn this into a real community center. While the focus remains on the kids, we’re also offering continuing education and various activities for adults.

“I love the idea that the kids see we’re doing something for them, and they’re learning to give back. I remember one girl who came to the center from Mexico. She couldn’t speak a word of English. She started taking classes and ended up getting a degree at Lee College. She came back and talked to us, and told us how much we had helped her. Those are the stories that I like to hear.”

— Fred Aguilar

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“I learned how to be a mother before I learned how to be a kid. I kind of raised my two younger sisters. I took care of them. I made sure they got to school all right and that their clothes were clean. I made sure they ate right. It was part of my job.

“Then, by the time I met my second husband, I was looking after four kids of my own, two boys and two girls. I told him, ‘Here’s the thing. I have four children and they go where I go. If you don’t expect me to keep my children, then you’ve got the wrong girl.’ My children were the most important thing in the world to me, and they still are. And he said, ‘Well, I expect you to keep your children.’

“I always wanted children. I wanted to raise my children like I wanted to be raised. My mother worked all of the time, so she didn’t really raise us. What could you do when you worked from 5 o’clock in the morning until 5 o’clock in the afternoon? You go to church together on Sunday and that’s about it.

“I knew that when I had kids, it was all going to be different. I wanted to be a mother to my children. I wanted to be close enough to them that they could rely on me more than I thought I could rely on my mother. Well, I could rely on her, but I didn’t know that at the time because she never was home. Just being there for my kids, that was the most important part.”

— Frankie Johnson

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“I had this big house, and I liked being around kids. So I decided to have a daycare.

“At first I kept one or two kids in my home, and then it grew to about 17 kids with just me. Oh, they had rules at the time. But I told this state worker, ‘You need to know right off the top that I don’t like to obey rules. I like to do my children like I like to do my children. I take care of them. I feed them. I change their clothes. If we’re going to have problems, let’s get them out there now.’ She told me that as long as I cared for them properly, I was good.

“I wanted to have more babies than anything else, so that’s what I did. I told her, ‘I need babies around me. I need to be able to hold them and carry them around.’ She said that was OK, as long as I didn’t overdo it.

“Some of those kids, you looked around and there wouldn’t be anybody for them. I wanted to be there for them. I’m not saying I’m the best mother in the world, but I’ve always loved kids. I’ve always loved taking care of them. I’d still do it today if I could.”

— Frankie Johnson

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“I was involved with Little League baseball for a number of years, as a league president, city coordinator and then assistant district administrator. I enjoyed working with a lot of great people and playing a role in looking out for the kids.

“I got to make sure everything was going for the kids and not for the parents, if you know what I mean. It could be challenging. We had one parent who liked to come to the ballpark and drink. He’d get a little belligerent and start yelling at his son. Consuming alcohol on city property and Little League property was one thing, but embarrassing his son and messing up his ability to play, that just don’t go.”

— Gary Bruns

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These sisters-in-law have children ranging from 4 months to 8 years old.

“Kids are growing up really fast nowadays. They want to boss you around. They want to tell you what to do, where they can go and what time they can do it at. I guess some parents let them do whatever they want.”

“From my experience teaching sixth- and seventh-graders, I think they just need more attention and guidance. My goal in raising my son is for him to turn out healthy, educated and happy.”

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“We’ve been a local ministry for six years now, and we’re planning to move to a new location.

“What we’ve been doing out here for about the last year and a half is fundraising to help us build our new center from the ground up. A big part of this will be helping to keep kids off the streets through various activities. We want to keep their minds as occupied as possible, so they can focus on doing something positive in the community.”

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