“If I stop to think about everything that’s happened — being in a difficult marriage, getting a divorce, raising three young girls on my own — it’s a lot. But I think I’ve come a long way, as far as learning more about myself, and growing as a person and a mother. I think I’ve become a more confident person. That’s a huge thing for me.

“I was always pretty introverted and shy. But I feel like I’ve come way out of my shell, especially since the divorce four years ago. I’m much more independent and confident now. I’ve kind of had to be.

“Don’t get me wrong. I still have moments where I struggle with that a little bit, just because of the challenges of daily life. The house may not be perfectly clean all the time and I may lose patience with my girls every now and then. But overall, I guess I’m pretty proud of myself for what I’ve been able to accomplish.

“Although I have no family living close by, I haven’t done this all on my own. There have been so many people through church and other friends who have provided support. I wouldn’t be in the place I am now without them.

“I feel like there’s so much that I’ve learned and still have to learn. And I’m still facing some big challenges. But I have what I call this radical faith that’s helping lead me through it all. In the end, I’m going to have this huge story to tell. I think it will help somebody else who might be going through a rough time in their life. If I can be that person who can help others, then that will really be something I can be proud of.”

— Erynn Anderson

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“We’ve been staying with my mom and stepdad since January. But I’m looking for a new apartment. I’m saving up right now.

“I lived at my previous place for 16 years. When a new company bought them out, they raised my rent by $300. They didn’t give me much notice. So we had to move out.

“I had to get a cheaper car because I couldn’t afford those payments anymore. Also, he turned 18, so I’m no longer getting child support. That hurts because he’s a senior, and this is his most expensive year in school with things like cap and gown, pictures and graduation invitations.

“I’ve always been a single mom. I’ve never been married. I was lucky that I actually did get child support for most of his life.

“It’s tough right now. But we get by. I’m sure there are a whole lot of other people out there who are worse off than I am. I don’t make a ton at my job, so it’s been pretty challenging lately. But we’ve always made it. I think we’ve done pretty well, considering. We’re like a team. He’s my buddy.”

— Leslie Hebert (with son, Luke)

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“I have two daughters, and I raised them pretty much on my own. Being a single mom has been tough at times. Because of work and everything, you’re not always able to be there with them as much as you’d like.

“I was a scaffold builder helper for 16 years in the chemical plants. It was hard work, long hours, but it paid decent. It allowed me to take care of the bills and put food on the table.

“And I’ve always tried to set a good example for my children and talk to them about what not to do. You know, don’t do some of the things that I did along the way.

“Overall, I think I’ve done a pretty good job. They’re 21 and 26 now, and I have two grandchildren. I’m very proud of my girls. They’ve become strong, young women.”

— Xochitl Rodriguez

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“I’m a single mom. I’ve never been married. I was with his dad for six years. Then I was with another man for nine years, but we split up recently.

“Now I’ve decided it might just be easier to raise him on my own. Because when your child gets attached to someone, and then that person is no longer there, it’s very difficult.

“I’ve always thought that kids should have both a mom and a dad. But his real dad is not a good person. His stepdad, the one who was there for nine years, he’s a good person. He just changed his mind, I guess, which is really hard to explain to a 12-year-old.

“I told him that life is about change. You can either be miserable about it or you can learn from it. Since you don’t want to be miserable your whole life, you try to grow from your experiences.

“He doesn’t have a dad right now, so that’s hard. But sometimes it’s for the best. He’s a good kid. He’s a strong kid for everything he’s had to go through.”

— Kim Myers

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“Well, to be honest with you, my challenge is finding a respectful man in my life. I’m very picky. Very particular. I’m not argumentative, but I can be very stern and very hard sometimes. I don’t like being that hard, but that’s just me. So if I do find someone, I’ll try to work on that.

“I have dated, but I can’t find one to be obedient. It’s very hard for me to encounter a man that I can trust.

“I was a single mom for a long time. My children are older now. They’re happy and able to take care of themselves, so that’s a blessing.

“I’m still hopeful of finding someone. But as you get older, you become more settled in your life and you don’t necessarily want to be bothered with the how and the where, you know what I mean?”

— Stacey Ceasar

The post Finding the right man can be problematic appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“My biggest challenge right now is probably my son’s dad. We’re separated, and trying to get him to become more involved with my son has been difficult. I don’t think he was as ready to be a dad as he thought he was.

“Now I’m a single mom with a 15-month-old son, and he’s so easy. I’m finding that life as a single mom is much easier than still being with his dad.”

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