“Growing up, there was a lot of chaos and turmoil in my home. I had two drug-addicted parents. And when I was 8, my mom started dealing drugs. People were coming and going. There were a lot of unsafe activities. There was alcohol. There was physical and other abuse. It was just an insanely unhealthy situation.

“But I was determined to have a good life. Whether they were passed out on the couch or whatever, it wasn’t going to affect my day. I kind of had to be the sun, moon and stars for myself. I had to be the author of my own life. I realized that if I didn’t make happiness for myself, then I’d be sitting in my room crying and miserable all the time.

“I tried my best to self-isolate or disassociate. I was doing a lot of escapism. I loved anything fantasy. I was a really smart kid, and I loved reading books. I loved writing stories. I also rode my bike a lot. Whatever it took to make sure I had a good time, despite what was going on around me. My sister was several years older, but she wasn’t really hands on with me. So I was pretty independent.

“When I was nearly 12, my mom seemed ready to stop doing drugs and turn over a new leaf. That was great. I was happy for her. But then she had herself a last hurrah, and she overdosed. She didn’t make it. I was devastated. Despite everything that had been going on for years, I loved my mom very much. Even though she was not awesome to me, I still thought the world of her. I was the kind of person who tried to make everything seem better than it really was.

“A few days after the funeral, without my knowledge, my father signed over his rights to me to my grandfather. And he left, just took off. I was pretty upset. I thought for sure that my mom’s death was going to be his wake-up call. That we were going to be OK. We were going to try to be normal people now. But that wasn’t the case.

Turning to drugs

“After I started living with my grandparents, my grandmother had a big stroke. I was helping take care of her. And because of my mom’s death, they all told me that she shouldn’t be under any more stress. So I was never really able to grieve. I had to swallow all that. I was so angry and lonely. It’s no excuse, but it’s kind of what led me down the path of doing drugs to numb those feelings

“As a high school freshman, I was falling off badly. I couldn’t see how anything was worth being sober for. I was doing any substance I could get my hands on. I was really addicted to certain prescription pills in my high school years. I wasn’t going to class. I was way behind on my credits. By my senior year, they put me in alternative school. The principal was like, ‘You need to get this under control.’ And I did buckle down and even finished early. You couldn’t tell me a damn thing. I was still on drugs, and I felt like a million bucks. I felt unstoppable

“I decided to do graduation huge. So I got a hotel room and stayed there for about three months. All my friends were with me. It was always a party. But when the end of summer came, everyone left.

“My lowest point came while lying on the hotel room bed after taking I don’t even know how many pills. I told myself if I overdosed that night, it wouldn’t even matter. Maybe I’d go where my mom went, and I wouldn’t hurt anymore. I started feeling like my heart was slowing down, and then I kind of faded. I was so accepting of, ‘I’m dying.’ But I woke up the next morning. And the heartbreak that I felt, realizing that I hadn’t died, was unbelievably heavy. I wanted to hang myself.

“Then I started thinking about when I was a kid, how I told myself that if nobody ever made the happiness, it was up to me. I felt that I’d let myself down because I hadn’t made any happiness for myself in a really long time. That’s when I decided to leave the hotel room, go home to my grandparents, and start making some changes.

‘These kids are awesome’

“At 18, I began a relationship with my now husband, Kory. We’d been best friends forever. We had our ups and downs, and when I was 20, I had a miscarriage. I’d told myself if I ever got the chance to be a mom, I’d make sure I had a normal family. So that rocked me really hard. It left me heartbroken.

“A few months after that, I got pregnant again, and we had our first biological son together. That put everything into perspective. Feeling the love of a child and for a child was groundbreaking. When he was about 9 months old, I learned that I was pregnant again. And I started to feel this dread. What if I can’t love this new child as much as my other one? I thought my love for my first son and my older stepson was enough.

“Then one day I told myself, this is going to be my mom’s baby. Even though my mom was very tan, my older sister had blue eyes and almost blonde hair, light skin. They told her, whenever you have a second child, it’s probably going to be a boy. She started fantasizing about having this angelic, blue-eyed, almost blonde-haired, light-complected little boy. Then here I come with tan skin, brown eyes, dark hair. Anyway, I told my husband that this was going to be my mom’s baby. I was sure it was going to be a boy with blue eyes. I woke up the next day with this sense of knowing, this peace. And sure enough, he was born exactly how I pictured.

“These kids are awesome. Our oldest will be 14 in February. Our middle son just turned 9 and our youngest is 7. I love all my children, but the youngest definitely holds a special place in my heart. He reminds me so much of my mom.

“Even though life was extremely difficult when I was young, with my mom on drugs and not always around, I loved her very much. So with my youngest, I’ve always had this sense of familiarity that I felt for my mom. Maybe I just dreamed the whole thing up. But I’ll embrace it. I feel like I deserve every single bit of magic there is.

Unwelcome health scares

“Four years ago, my husband was driving us home from Austin, and I started to feel weird. I was getting a headache, and my vision was getting fuzzy. I didn’t want to overreact. I was going to try to sleep the rest of the way.

“When we got home, I sluggishly walked into the house and basically passed out on my bed. I woke up the next day, opened my eyes, and there’s this big blind spot in my vision. I still had this splitting headache. And I’m like, what the hell is happening? I spent a lot of time with my grandmother after several strokes. I saw the symptoms present in her, but nothing like this. So I immediately put stroke out of my head.

“I was in the hospital a week, doing every test possible. They didn’t know what was going on. Until I got the CT scans back. Guess what? I had a damn stroke. I was beside myself. Here I was, 26 years old, and I’m like, what the hell? They have to give me medicine to calm me down.

“Then they do an ultrasound, and they find out that I have a hole in my heart. In rare cases, it can send a blood clot to your brain and cause a stroke. And I’m like, this cannot be happening to me. Haven’t I had enough bullshit in my life?

“I had been doing everything right around that time. I was hiking with my kids, eating right, drinking plenty of water. I was angry about the whole thing. It seemed so unfair. I’d been through so much already in my life, so I didn’t want anymore. Like, whoever has my voodoo doll, you can stop now.

“It happened during COVID. So I couldn’t have visitors. I was losing my mind because I’m away from my kids, my babies, who are extremely attached to me. I felt very isolated and stressed out. I had all these breakdowns, but then I started having breakthroughs. I was like, OK, I’m going to come out of here bigger and better. Nothing can stop me. I’m actually a tsunami. And it was because of my love for plants and gardening. I had big ideas that I was determined to make happen.

Gardening therapy

“Before my stroke, I had discovered a love for gardening. I found solace in plants, a purpose and sense of reward. I started collecting succulents, and I was having a whole lot of fun with it. It was very therapeutic. I was making breakthroughs without having to go to a therapist.

“I started to sell a few plants here and there through social media. Then I decided that I was going to make it into a little side business. It would allow me to stay flexible with the kids and do something for myself. So I set up a plant page on Instagram.

“Our family has deep roots in Baytown, and I wanted to find a way to connect with my community. I wanted everyone to love plants and gardening as much as I do. While I was in the hospital, I started focusing on what I’d do when I got out. I had this extensive knowledge from researching and working with these plants. And I’m like, I could teach people all about it. That’s what I’m going to do.

“Since then, I’ve done a lot. I’ve taught plant classes for little kids at daycares. I was blessed with an opportunity to work with students at an elementary school in La Porte. I’ve done countless classes for adults. I’m a regular at Baytown’s farmers market, and I plan to start going to the one in Mont Belvieu. It’s all about succulents. And I’m having a blast. Hopefully, making a difference in people’s lives.

“Looking back on everything that’s happened in my life, where I’ve been and where I am now, I feel this overwhelming sense of happiness, this sense of magic. Just knowing that I can do whatever I want to do. Overcoming adversity in every possible way. From drug-addicted parents to being a drug addict myself, to having a stroke, and permanently losing some of my vision. To having a husband, kids, and being able to be a loving person despite what I’ve gone through. I’ve never let anything stop me from doing what I want.

“I’m going to write a book about my life one day. It’s going to be fantastic. Just watch. I can’t wait.”

— Felicia Garcia

The post Magical life blooms after challenging start appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“It was all kind of a blur for me. All I know is that I woke up in a hospital bed with a half-shaved head. The first thing I asked my nurse was, ‘Can you get me some lip balm?’ Because I need stuff on my lips at all times. I bet that lip balm cost me $100.

“I learned that because of a brain bleed, a subdural hematoma, they had to do emergency surgery to relieve the pressure. I was in the ICU for about a week. I felt fine. I got bored. Mostly, I was upset about my hair. After I got out, my kids were like, ‘You should just shave your whole head and let it all grow back together.’ I was like, ‘No way.’ I had shoulder-length hair, and now I’ve got short hair.

“My husband was scared to leave me by myself. But I was like, ‘I’m fine.’ Then I had a stroke. I was life-flighted to Tyler, and I was coherent during all that. I was just mad that I couldn’t see out the helicopter window.

“After a day or so, I started losing my speech. I would forget how to say words. Then I lost feeling in my right hand. I was in the hospital for a week. My voice started coming back. My hand was coming back. But I still had a long way to go. I would sometimes slur my words, so I sounded like I was drunk.

“I don’t know what I would have done without my husband, Tim, by my side. He did everything for me. He made me speak when I didn’t want to speak. He gave me sentences to say every day. He made me do physical exercises when I didn’t feel like it. As a chiropractor, he’s trained for it. I’ll just say he’s been my rock through everything. It’s why I’m here today.”

— Stacey Lundberg Stiff

Stacey has been a teacher for 25 years. She taught seventh grade at Gentry Junior School in Baytown, before the family moved to Jacksonville, Texas.

Related:

• Surprise proposal leads to long marriage

The post Husband ‘my rock’ through surgery, stroke appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“In December 2019, I suffered a stroke and seizures that put me in a comatose state. I was on life support. My family was devastated and confused as to why all of this was happening to me.

“The team of doctors taking care of me in the ICU had to break the news to my mother that I possibly would end up brain dead. Her first thought was, ‘What will I tell my granddaughter, and how will we both overcome this tragedy?’

“Thank God that he had other plans for me and my family. After three days of being unconscious, I woke up. I remember being very confused and unable to speak since I had tubes running down my throat. Everyone in the room just stared at me in awe, as if a miraculous event had just happened. And it did. After medical professionals had informed my family that I probably would never be the same again, there I was. When I got a pen and paper from my mom, there were tears of joy all around the room as they watched me write to communicate my thoughts.

“Since that terrifying incident, I’ve been in and out of hospitals. I have end-stage renal disease. I do dialysis three times per week. I also have lupus nephritis, which attacks the kidneys and other organs. My kidney function is at 5%. So far, my body is not responding well to hemodialysis treatments.

“For more than a year, I have struggled and pushed myself to keep going despite feeling like I wanted to give up because I was tired of suffering. I cried and said to my mother, ‘I can’t do this anymore. I just want to die.’ But my mom hasn’t let me give up. She reminded me to keep pushing for my daughter. My death would change her life forever. She needs her mother more than anything in this world.”

— Cynthia Enderli

Cynthia needs a new kidney, but she faces challenges in getting one. Read more on her GoFundMe page.

The post Mom needs kidney for future with daughter appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“I gave birth to my son in 2013. A couple months after that, my aunt had a stroke. There was no one available to help her get through the physical therapy, bring her to doctor’s appointments, sit with her, and make sure she was taking her medications. She was partially paralyzed on her left side. So she couldn’t drive. She couldn’t pick up a lot of things. She had trouble walking. She needed someone to help her with all that. And that person was me.

“I became her caregiver for about four months. It was pretty challenging. I was this new mom, taking care of my baby and my aunt at the same time. He was with me when I drove into Houston to take her to physical therapy three times a week, and back and forth to doctor’s appointments. To be honest, I didn’t really know what I was doing. For both of them.

“I remember thinking, what would my mom do if she was in this situation? That inspired me to do what I had to do. My mom is this nurse who has taken care of people for years. So I kind of imitated her, and that’s how we got through it.

“I was breastfeeding my son at the time. My aunt gave me the nickname, Meals on Wheels, because he was always hungry. There were times when she needed help getting to the bathroom or doing something else, and I would have to put him down for a minute. Of course he would cry. I’d be like, I’m so sorry, but my aunt needs me more right now. There were moments where I had to take a break and just breathe. Then I would drive home and get ready to do it all over again early the next morning.

“My son is 6 years old now. He is doing fine. My aunt is 80-something, and she is doing fine, off her medications and living well. We are all OK.”

— Maureen St. louis Nelson

Maureen is writing a book, “Through Their Eyes.” It will highlight stories of people in the health care profession and others who are caregivers. If you are in one of those roles and would like to share your experiences for the book, contact Maureen at bluemsnelson@gmail.com.

Related:

• She’s surrounded by a family of caregivers

• Poem about lost pets becomes children’s book

The post ‘Meals on Wheels’ met caregiver challenge appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“Early on, my dad was a route driver for Faust Distributing. He delivered Falstaff beer before they changed to Miller. He worked there for years. But then he had a stroke, and he just couldn’t do that work anymore.

“So he went to work for Lee College as a maintenance supervisor. It was really hard for him. Like, ‘I’m going to be a janitor?’ It was a very humbling experience.

“But Dr. Cloud, who was the president there at the time, recognized the struggle my dad was dealing with. So he sent him to some Dale Carnegie courses for free. That really helped my dad turn his attitude around. He learned how to do things like redo hardwood floors, because he had to keep up with the gym. So he got this extra skill set. He became very proud of his work.

“Years later, I was helping a guy who had a computer company, and I knew that he was a professor at Lee College. My dad was retired from the college at the time. When the professor learned who my dad was, he shared this story that he told his students every year.

“He said, ‘I told them that he was an intelligent man. I knew he was very proud of his work. But I also knew that he probably had the ability to do a lot more than that. I didn’t know how he got there. I didn’t know why he was doing janitorial work. But he was very proud of the job he was doing and he had a very good attitude.’ He said, ‘I told my class, that’s a take on life that everybody should have. No matter where you are or what you’re doing, you need to make the best of it.’ I thought that was so neat. And when I told my dad, he couldn’t have been more proud.”

— Cindy Rios

Cindy’s dad, Eliseo Rios, was nicknamed “Bambi” in high school because of his ability to run the hurdles in track. Her mother, Winona, was one of the first women to own and operate a barbershop in Baytown. The 13th of 15 children, Winona continued cutting hair into her 80s.

Related:

• Life coach gets gift of compassion from parents

The post Dale Carnegie courses help turn around attitude appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“My wife and I just had our 25th anniversary. We’ve been through a heck of a lot together. 

“She lost both sons from her previous marriage. Blake, he was murdered in 1992. He was tied up and stabbed 42 times with a kitchen knife. Ross, he died of a heart attack in 2011. And Jo Ellen, she had a stroke in 2007.

“She worked in food service for Goose Creek schools for 33 years. One morning when she was at work real early, she started feeling bad and then fell to the floor. There was not a soul around, so she tried to crawl to a phone to call 911. About that time, her boss walked in and then the assistant principal showed up, and they rushed her to the hospital.

“It was a major stroke. She has left side neglect, to where she doesn’t look to the left at all. She doesn’t have any use of her left arm, but she is able to walk with a cane. 

“She’s well known in Baytown. Everywhere we go, somebody knows her. The older kids, the ones who graduated from Lee High School, they recognize her and always say hi. 

“To have gone through so many traumatic things in her life and to be able to survive like she has, my wife is an amazing person. I consider her my friend, my hero, my everything.”

— Jerry Young

The post His wife is ‘my friend, my hero, my everything’ appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“I had a brain stem stroke in 1988 when I was 26, so I’ve had my physical challenges. My mind is great. It’s just the physical ability.

“I’m not paralyzed, but I can’t walk because of the stroke. I’m naturally left-handed, but I can only use my right arm. I had to learn how to do everything with my right hand. I didn’t have a choice.

“Because of the State of Illinois going broke, it affected my disability benefits. I wasn’t able to continue getting all the therapy I needed. Things have been much better in Texas.

“After my stroke I went back to school. Over the course of about eight years I got two degrees, one in engineering technology and one in graphic design. But I couldn’t get a job, so I designed these unique spoons out of my own education. Hopefully, I can make a business out of it.”

How do you spend most days?
“Thinking about how I’m going to sell all these spoons. We’ve sold a couple hundred sets, but I ordered 10,000. I still have a storage unit full of them.

“I want to get off state benefits. If we can make it, I can get off social security, off food stamps. You know, some people take advantage of having those kinds of things. I don’t want to be on food stamps or medical insurance. Why shouldn’t I try to make myself better?”

— Ken Vantroba

Learn more about Cuddle Spoons

The post Small business owner doesn’t let stroke stop him appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“When she was 11, she was in an auto-pedestrian accident while waiting for the bus. She died twice while in Life Flight, had a stroke and sustained a serious brain injury.

“The doctors gave little hope that she would see, hear, speak or have any function. She had to learn to do everything all over again: sit up, walk, speak, eat, drink. She struggles with memory problems, seizures, ticks, and has little use of her left arm. However, she is the happiest, sweetest person you will ever meet.

“When she died, she said she went to heaven. God sent her back to share with everyone what he did for her.”

— Nancy Davie

The post Auto-pedestrian accident recovery remarkable appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“I had been on vacation for two weeks and came back to work, but I couldn’t figure out how to turn on my computer. My boss said, ‘You’ve gotten so old, you don’t know how to do that?’ I couldn’t do anything, so they took me to the hospital.

“They said I was under stress. I said I couldn’t be under stress since I just came back from vacation. It was a stroke. I lost all the facilities on my right side. It took me about a year and a half to recover, although at times I’m still incapacitated.

“When I want to say something, I sometimes don’t know how to say it. I’ll start to say something and my husband will finish the sentence for me. And I’ll say, ‘No that’s not what I wanted to say.’ He’ll say, ‘Yes it is.’ It can be frustrating.”

— Carol Rhoudes

The post She’s still dealing with effects of her stroke appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“I came here in 1976 from Trinidad. I was just passing through on my way to Saudi Arabia, where I was going to work for a company as an instrument fitter supervisor. Before I left, I wanted to raise money to buy clothes so I took on a construction job at Exxon.

“Then I got a stroke. It paralyzed my whole right side. That prevented me from going, which turned out to be a blessing. If I had gone to Saudi Arabia, I would have been a dead man. I would have had the stroke and nobody there would have understood my language, my thick accent.

“I think by God sending me here, it ended up saving my life.”

The post On the way to Saudi Arabia, stroke changes his life appeared first on The Baytown Project.