“Throughout my life, it seems like people have always been seeking my advice on how to handle certain situations. I’ve often wondered, why me? What is it that I provide that’s helpful? Maybe it stems from the fact that I’ve been through some hell, and I’ve persevered. Also, I tell the truth. I don’t hold back. I say, ‘I’m telling you this out of love. But know that you’ve got to do different if you want to make a change.’

“I have mentors, too, who help me figure out what I want in life. Really, that’s what life is all about. You have things you want to achieve, but you may not know how to make it happen.

“I’ve always been a person who lives by truth, no matter how ugly it is. I teach my children: you’re responsible for you. I am legally. But spiritually, you’re responsible to connect with who you are and know who you are, so that you can then impact others around you. Because we’re only here for a split second. My kids are fully aware that they’re going to die one day. That is the one thing everyone is promised. So what is it that you want to do before then? Who is it that you want to impact?

“I’ve started to do life coaching because I love helping people figure out who they are and where their next step is in life’s journey. When I sat in therapy and looked at the therapist, I was like, that’s the chair I want to be in. I want to help people understand why they think the way they do, why they’re in the situation they’re in, and help them move to their future selves. I think that’s my gift, and I enjoy sharing it.”

— Rebekah Mansker

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• Her childhood was ‘really, really hell’

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“I was molested when I was a kid, from age 2 to 9, the whole time by my mother’s boyfriend. She had no idea. When she found out, it was over. Never saw him again. Decided not to press charges. She didn’t want to put me through all that. Going through the court system, with a trial and everything, would have been horrific. So she made the decision, which I’m very comfortable with now.

“I went to therapy immediately. I don’t know if I’m just really good at compartmentalizing things. But after a while, the therapist told my mom that I was OK. And I did feel fine. But because of that experience, sex has always been kind of weird to me. Like, I have issues with sex. Part of it just grossed me out. And I’m like, that’s not normal. So my whole life, I’ve been in and out of therapy trying to deal with that. I’ve been in therapy maybe 10 times, and the goal is always to resolve that issue. Because thinking sex is disgusting is not normal, and I would like to be a little more normal.

“Well, every time I do therapy, at some point we start talking about my weight. And I get that. Yes, I was abused. Yes, I didn’t want anybody to ever touch me again. So subconsciously, that’s most likely why I put on all this weight, to protect myself. We don’t want anybody to touch us. So we get big and gross to protect ourselves. I’ve seen and read a lot about it. It happens to a lot of people. So I get that. At some point, we have to deal with my weight. But we never get back to the sex being disgusting. And that irritates me. That’s why I keep going back to therapy, to try to get that part resolved. That’s always what I’m there to fix, but it never gets fixed.”

— Sheena Gordon

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• When suicide leads to the blame game

The post Sexual abuse as child continues to haunt her appeared first on The Baytown Project.

“I’m studying psychology. I really want to work with kids, mostly troubled kids so I can give them a better chance to become positive additions to our society.

“As a therapist, I think you need to be patient, a good listener and not judgmental. I’ve always been a really good listener. People would come and tell me their troubles. I’m a little bit on the shy side so I’m more of a listener than talker anyway. It’s something that’s always come pretty easy to me.”

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“My therapist recommended that I do this to help me out with my anger management. I’ve been dealing with it for a long, long time. I would wake up angry. But ever since I started doing woodworking, it’s helped me greatly. Maybe it’s just getting my mind off other things.

“I have a complete shop. I build all sorts of stuff, like yard art and swings. I even built picnic tables for a couple of Houston Texans to use in their backyards. Talk about heavy-duty work, those guys are huge.”

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“I did drugs for about 15 years and considered myself an addict for about a year and a half. It started as experimentation as a kid, and it just progressed. When I hit meth, it got really bad.

“The lowest point was when I started to sacrifice morals by stealing. That’s when I just decided this is crazy behavior, I’ve got to stop. I did 12-step programs for a long time. Even though I’m not active in it now, that’s still the basis for my life. 

“Now I’m back at college studying to be a substance abuse counselor. It’s a place I probably should have been 20 years ago, but I guess I’ve come full circle. What better way to relate to somebody than through experience.

“Recently a therapist said to me, ‘You’re a brave man. Most people don’t want to go into that field because chemically addicted clients are very difficult to work with.’ But I know how they think. It’s one of those things that you just can’t understand unless you’ve been there. I think I’ve got an edge there.”

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• ‘Professional student’ never stops learning

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