Mother’s advice: always respect yourself

“The death of my mother is definitely something that I had to deal with because I was not prepared. I mean, nobody’s really prepared for death. I was an only child. Being as close as I was to her, it catches you off guard. You’re just not ready.

“As long as my mother was alive, I didn’t have to grow up. I didn’t have to worry about a thing because she was right there. She took care of everything. But once she left me, I had to step into that role, become the woman that I’m supposed to be, and just go on with my life.

“It’s been 25 years since she passed. I was 30-something at the time. So I was old enough. I worked all the time. I had a child. And I was very responsible. My mother taught me to be that. She taught me a lot of things.

“What I miss most is just being with her, talking with her, and getting advice from her. The best advice she ever gave me was to always, always, number one, respect yourself. She would preach that to me all the time. She said, a reputation for a woman is easy to get but it’s hard to get away from. And she said, you don’t ever want to get a bad reputation. So respect yourself first, and then be respectful of others.

“I’ve carried that with me. And I’ve laid that piece of wisdom on my own daughter. Just passing it on to the next generation.”

— Mary Arceneaux

Mary, who lives in Crosby, teaches Sunday school at Greater St. John Missionary Baptist Church in Baytown.